Excuses,excuses.

So I was incredibly over zealous with my prediction to blog/spill my mental cognitions via the internet on a daily basis - but in all fairness I do think I've had quite an eventful few weeks.

Between pouring pints for punters eagerly riding the steamboat at Tennant's Vital, reliving my teen years at the Coach (a vile, under age cesspit of wkd induced drunkiness which attempts to disguise itself as a "club"). Any my latest adventure, which I'm currently still on, which has involved attempting to be metropolitan in Poland for a week.

When I say metropolitan, it was more a boarder line albino Northern Irish girl sitting outside with a book on Schindler's factory while puffing on a Marlborough menthol. C'est la vie, non?

No.

I thought dialogue via the internet would encourage me to be a little less convoluted than usual - a chance to practice the art of succinct and precise communication. Yet here I am, producing line after line of viral vomit. I once again apologise. It is however somewhat cathartic. I'm sure my friends, although they're probably not aware of it yet, are experiencing some relief from my constant yammering and attempts to be humorous. And I wonder why my best friend is constantly clutching a glass of red wine.

I hope this entry can serve as a life lesson to all you readers, never, ever, EVER make the mistake of going for a few "casuals" the night before a flight. I can genuinely say that was the most horrific two and a half hours I've ever experienced. I felt like someone had hallowed out my skull and filled it with marbles. A dull, continuous rattle periodically coupled with the urge to projectile vomit down the isle.

I was also skankily clad in last nights clothes, dirt smeared up my arm and shame across my soul. It's safe to say that in my war with the devil's buttermilk (vodka), I have been completely and utterly annihilated. My dignity and emotional stability being the two main casualties. But as they never say, "When in Krakow!".

I'll give you a moment or two to mentally digest and prepare for the next installment of my euro envision, thanks again persevering with me!